I've never felt so much Love

 'I never felt so much love.' 

‘I haven’t felt this much love since our wedding day.’

These are the most common comments from women after The Making Love Retreat.

Why? Is it that love was never there, and it suddenly arrived within a few days? Is it that she didn’t love before? 

No. In a ceremony, such as a wedding, you are standing opposite each other, eyes connected. You have a moment or a few moments of pure presence with each other through the eyes. 

And in that pure moment, love floods the heart. A lack of feeling love is not because there was no love before. It’s that it wasn’t given passage. 

Love is not something that comes and goes. Love is your natural state.

But triggered emotions cover over the heart and stop the flow. We are convinced that love is no longer there.

Love is often not given a pathway for expression. A pathway to receive it and a pathway to give it. An authentic pathway. 

Eye contact increases the 'cuddle hormone', oxytocin, which, even after 2 minutes, can increase bonding and attachment. A child who receives regular direct eye contact will be a more secure child than one whose caregivers' eyes are always averted. It's the same for adults.

'In 1989, researchers divided 96 strangers into pairs and asked them to do one of three things: stare at each other’s hands, count each other’s eye blinks (superficial eye contact), or gaze intently into each other’s eyes (deep eye contact). Subjects who gazed into each other's eyes reported the greatest feelings of mutual attraction and affection.

Next, the researchers asked 144 couples how much they liked their partners and how passionately they loved them. The 72 couples then gazed into each other’s eyes for two minutes—no talking, just looking deeply into each other’s eyes. The result: Mutual attraction and passion increased significantly.'  (ref. Psychology Today)

It is said that love is, in fact, not the highest vibration. Authenticity is the highest. And when you have authentic eye contact where there are no walls, no barriers, no veils of protection or projection, only authentic love is left. 

That’s why we feel so moved, because we finally begin to feel safe.

For a woman, the need to protect herself falls away. There is no longer the pressure to please or appease. It's a relief. She is relaxed. She can trust. 

Instead, there is just simplicity. It’s enough to be in this moment of unbridled love. Of surrender and peace. 

And if one keeps allowing and surrendering, then intimacy can follow, if it wants to.

What you can do:-

Each day, allow some time to sit with each other and take 5 or 10 minutes to connect with yourself, and then open your eyes and be with each other. No speaking. Just silent eye contact. Without words, letting the other know non-verbally that you are present with them. It can do wonders when it is done with commitment and regularity. 

If you struggle to make eye contact, it usually indicates that you are dealing with emotions. It may then help to allow these to be felt and moved through in order to be able to come back into connection through eye contact. Sometimes, eye contact can melt whatever feelings and emotions are sitting there. 

So I highly recommend setting aside time in your day to be authentically present with each other. A lack of presence, a lack of tending to the relationship in this way, can lead to distance, a feeling of abandonment, a very deep wound for many. It's too easy for each to go into their minds and imagine all sorts of things about the other that actually may not be real.

Love grows through acceptance, connection, trust, and respect.

And genuine eye contact that is not forced opens the gateway to this love. 

Next Making Love Retreat - BYRON BAY 9th - 15th October

 (Article reference:- Psychology Today)